I Can Shoot Fire From My Hands!

You know who really talks with his hands?

Donald Rumsfeld.

It’s like he’s doing some kind of hand jive in every picture you see of him.

And the one’s I’ve been seeing lately show a disturbing trend.

Nothing Up My Sleeve

First, he’s got this kind of “Look, nothing up my sleeve” pose, that just makes me think he’s trying to misdirect us from seeing what’s going on, like some kind of stage magician. (I bet he wishes he could either make Iraq disappear, or suddenly pull some kind of exit strategy out of his hat.)

Fish Stories

The suddenly he’s telling “the one that got away” stories. I’m pretty sure bin Laden is a little bigger than that, but maybe that’s how big he looked on the latest tape or something. Or maybe Rummy knows something about Osama that we don’t.

Fireball!

Oh no, I’ve angered Rummy, and he’s going to obliterate me by shooting flames from his hands!

Actually, I wonder if after three years in Iraq, Rumsfeld is really starting to feel the pressue of the dissonance between what’s happening in the “reality-based” world and what should be happening in “neo-con” world. I would personally love to see him have a complete break from the “reality-based” world–you know running around Washington screaming “Lightning Bolt” like a LARP-er at anyone who brings up the new poll numbers, or something similar.

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This work by Chris McLaren is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.5 Canada.